Distance

As I sat beside you, I noticed

You were wearing that shirt,

Keeping us connected in some way.

Your presence made me at ease.

You laughed so hard.

You talked too loud.

Your gestures, your smile

Your hair, your voice...

I couldn't remember your joke, by the way.

I was busy figuring you out,

Trying to get the memories stuck in my mind.

I was too happy you were there.

And on that morning, in silence,

I was looking at your eyes

Waiting for you to look at me...

So sad, I waited too long.

Assumption

Then, signs came.

I understood it differently.

Thinking it was on my side,

I expected it to be mine.

But it never was.

It only brought more pain.

And I learned never to expect.

I stopped dreaming.

My smiles started to fade.

I was left behind.

Falling down all over again,

I got tired of hoping.

Wonder

That moment when you finished reading a book

And got your eyes stuck on the last page

Trying to say goodbye to a world inside your head.

It was as if losing something important but not.

I just got back to reality...

And nothing felt sadder than that.

Blurred Memories

Pink.

I see pink.

The smell of the pillow under my nose.

It makes me forget.

It makes me at peace.

Trying to feel the presence

Of the soft cushion underneath.

Support.

Fatigue.

It takes a while before I close my eyes.

Embracing the silence I've never had.

For the good.

For the worse.

I dream of good things.

"Few more minutes."

Five.

Four.

Three.

Realizing and remembering..

It is actually,

Black.

Space

I'm writing this
to let my feelings out.
I am currently in need of help.
I do not know what to do right now.
There are a lot of things going on
inside my head.

I am a mess.
I have questions.
I am lost.
I am afraid.

I am negative.
I am tired.
I am sad.

And need to be saved.

だから、気をつけて。

Cure

As I got off the car,

You walked towards my way.

You waved your hand.

And I waved mine.

You called my name.

And I was speechless.

Was it fate?

A mere coincidence?

Even if it was just for a few seconds..

Even if it did not even matter to you..

Thank you for being there.

I needed it.

The mistake is thinking there can be an antidote to the uncertainty. (The Lover's Dictionary)

Dreams

OH DREAMS

Why is it so hard?

The happiness turns to sorrow. All the luck will fade away.

Reaching and trying. Getting near, getting far.

The faith is great. Expectations are big.

The pressure is on. There is no going back.

White becomes black. The tables have turned.

Pride, ego and lies. I died and I cried.

Why will you let my hopes up..

then always turn me down?